Funny computer stories…

by techtiptom

Originally posted on WIBC.com on 10/15/2009:

Gathered from the net:

* I gave a new mouse to a friend. She called me all upset claiming the mouse was not working properly and she was in the middle of an important deadline and had no time for computer problems. I went over to see what the problem was, and asked her to show me. “You see! It goes totally in the opposite direction I want it to go. It’s definitely damaged,” she said. I turned the mouse 180 degrees and said: “Try it now.” “Oops, that was it?” she asked surprised. Never grab a mouse by its tail or it may bite you!

* I use the term right click and left click and don’t think twice about it. I have a left-handed friend and everything in our phone fix call went good until the right click and left click were doing the same thing on the screen. I had never encountered this before, so I presumed that the mouse was defective. After going through this a couple of times I figured out that he was not changing buttons but changing hands. Right click was right handed and left was left handed. I explain the action more clearly now.

* My wife’s aunt and uncle, when first dealing with e-mail, couldn’t figure out why they could only see the first few lines in an e-mail message. After 20 frustrating minutes on the phone, I went to their house to show them how to use the down arrow to scroll through their e-mail messages!

* We typically fix employees’ personal computers for free, and one day a gal asked me to take a look at her home computer because the CD-ROM drive wasn’t working.
I set the computer up on the bench, hooked up a monitor, keyboard, etc., and turned the thing on, observing the CD-ROM drive. It lit up and did its POST thing with no observable problems.

I then proceeded with my diagnostics by inserting a CD with some files on it to see if it could read the disk. After closing the tray it started to make some funny noises and would not read the disk at all.

Assuming that there was something wrong with the internal mechanics (judging by the noises it made), I decided to replace the drive. I began by removing the CD from the tray in preparation for shutting it down when I noticed a strange green object protruding slightly from the tray opening. Taking a pair of pliers I gently pulled out a 3-1/2 floppy disk her four-year-old son had inserted into the drive in an apparent attempt to get the CD-ROM drive to read a floppy disk.

Needless to say, the computer worked “fine” after that.

* After determining for a friend that his old monitor was shot and it was time for a new one, a phone call.

friend: Hey, I need to know… you know, on my computer, I have lot of icons.

me: yes?

friend: I mean, I have a lot of icons on my desktop.

me: OK.

friend: Well, I just need to know–when I get a new monitor, will I lose all of my icons?

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